Write Club: February 2011

It's about spelling, but if you find it interesting, you can click on the "grammar rants" label and get more of my spouting. Some of it might even be useful.

Stuff You Can Do to Annoy Me

Tell me that writing doesn’t matter.
Tell me that learning how to write won’t make a difference because it is such a subjective subject. (Duh, it’s subjective. That’s the point. You’re going to have to say a lot of things to a lot of different audiences and if you don’t know how to tailor what you say to your audience (not change what you’re saying, but changing the way you say it) you’ll be in big trouble.)
Be all bitter that you have to take this class even though you got the freakiest highest score on the AP test.
Tell me that you deserve a higher grade because you always got straight A’s in high school and everyone has always told you that you’re the smartest person they’ve ever met on the whole planet and probably on other planets, too.
Think you’re smarter than God.
Think that because you’re smarter than I am (and trust me, some of you are—I’m not even being sarcastic here), that I have nothing to teach you worth knowing.
Think that because you’re smarter than anyone, that you can’t learn anything from them.
Assume that truth must come from high, sparkly places. (Even Nazareth was considered a cultural backwater.)
Grade grubbing—in all its many, varied forms.
Have your mom stop by to talk to me about your grades. Or anything, really. Except maybe to chat. I like chatting. Unless it somehow devolves into a conversation about you and your grades.
Tell me that you hate me in the journal you know I’m going to read. (I mean, honestly!)
Read the newspaper in class.
Text message your girlfriend in class.
Listen to your ipod in class.
Text message anyone in class.
Skip class and then ask me if I can go over everything for you again.
Whine when your grade gets docked on a paper because you missed the class where I told you exactly how to get an A.
Think that your pathetic contributions to the world can’t make a difference. (Because they can.)
Think that because you’re not the “best” you can’t do something noble and important. (Who is the “best,” really? Everything is relative. Will to serve is a frapping lot more important than talent.)
Think that if you can’t be perfect it’s better not to do anything at all. You will never, let me repeat, never be perfect in this life. But if you don’t use your talents to serve God anyway, you’ll tick HIM off. That’s a whole lot worse than ticking me off. Yeah. If it helps, remember that Heavenly Father often calls those who seem less than worthy. Just look at Christ’s apostles.
Call me on the phone. Seriously, people. The phone freaks me out.

Just so you can't say I didn't tell you, here's how your grades are calculated

Not So Angry Letter: 100 points
RFIW Critical Analysis: 100 points
Informative Research Paper (Wiki): 100 points
Argument/persuasion paper (eBay): 100 points
Personal Narrative: 100 points
Great Works Papers (2): 100 points each
Coursework Log: 75 Points
Library and Grammar Tests: 30 points
Journal: 30 points
Honors Portfolio in Progress: 10 points
Blog Comments: 30 points
Syllabus Quiz, Why Write Quiz, MLA Quiz, Kristine Hansen Quiz: 50 points
Homework, participation, etc.: 85 points
__________________
TOTAL: 1010
940-1000=A; 900-939=A-
870-899=B+; 830-869= B; 800-829= B-
770-799=C+; 730-769=C; 700-729=C-
670-699=D+; 630-669=D; 600-629=D-
0-599=E

If you're in BYU Writing 150H sections 122, 126, or 129 you're in the right place.

Monday, February 28, 2011

I talked about this Grammar Rant in one of my classes today and promised a link.